John Chard

May 11, 2014

5.0

Kidnap Thriller 101. Sarcastic Spoilers Within Review. Off the bat lets say it, Gone is not a very bad movie, it has the requisite mystery elements, Amanda Seyfried makes for an engaging lead as the once kidnapped girl who nobody seems to believe, the cinematography (Michael Grady) is high quality and there's some decent moments of chills along the way. Unfortunately the film just exists as a case of unadventurous screenplay writing. Gone is written by Allison Burnett, who writes it like some homework assignment set by a bored lecturer at a film studies class. Everything about it is rank and file what you have seen a million times before in this type of genre offering. A bunch of characters file in for cameos under the guise of red herrings, while our spunky heroine single handedly out-foxes the whole of the Portland police force, while naturally evading capture at every juncture. Everyone but Seyfried's character are just on the periphery of things, where the likes of Wes Bentley and Jennifer Carpenter stand around hoping for the script to give them something worthwhile to do. In fact Carpenter's character is a set up for a late plot development, only for it to be the last we see of her, which is just bizarre in hindsight. Then the "big" finale arrives and the serial killer/kidnapper arrives and gets afforded the same "none" time as everyone else. Nothing remotely original here, sadly. It serves decent enough as a time filler, but once the hopelessly weak finale plays its hand, you may come away asking yourself this question, why do films like this continually get green lit by studios when they have nothing more to offer other than putting another title on a budding actor's CV? 5/10

The Movie Mob

Aug 19, 2022

6.0

**Overall : Could it have been better? Sure. Was it awful? No.** If you checked out the reviews for this movie elsewhere, you read that it is an absolute piece of garbage. And that just isn't true. It's a run-of-the-mill thriller with a very good performance by Amanda Seyfried as the main character that ends a little differently than expected. I enjoyed guessing who the killer was as the movie offered multiple red herrings to throw you off. Not one that I would say rush out to watch, but if you got a random need to watch a decent b-movie thriller, then maybe check this one out?

This is a treatise on the plight of white women. Not only will men kidnap you, but also when you escape no one will believe you! Why does every shot need to either be super claustrophobic or needlessly tracking? I felt like I was going to vomit. If I had, I would have enjoyed the taste in my mouth better than I enjoyed this piece of garbage. Maybe I'm being too harsh. There was a lot of stuff the Nancy Drew inside all of us would appreciate in this motion picture. Scratch that, I'm being commensurately harsh. Every character is either horribly stock or incredibly stupid, and the entire film has about four colors in it: grey, black, beige, and grey. They had *one* interesting moment, when she shoots the lock off in the bathroom, and they didn't even show it! Even the car chase was boring -- you call the Ford Bronco a "hunk of junk" *in* the movie, and you don't have the decency to crash it for the audience?! For shame. I will admit, though, I thought the creepy looking cop was gonna be the bad guy. Nice misdirection...